From the desk of Grace Marie Wilson
July 5, 2077
Hello Beauty Crazed readers - if there are still any of you left out there, it has been a long time since anything was posted on this site. Sadly, my great aunt Lisamarie passed away last month – we’re not sure how old she was, she lied about her age for so long so who knows!? If it makes you feel better, she went out just the way she always said she would, having fun (hang gliding) and looking fabulous!
When sorting through her things I found a box marked Beauty Crazed with all kinds of memorabilia from her blogging days as well as DVD’s (that’s what people used to store movies on) from a show called Continuum that she really liked. Since the premise of the show was time travel 65 years in the future, I thought a post about what has happened in the world of fashion and beauty in the past 65 years would be a nice way to honour Aunt LM’s memory.
From the show you might have been concerned that the norm would become those skin tight jumpsuits like the one Kiera wore but as no one has been able to come up with a diet that actually works or has been smart enough to outlaw saturated fats and fast food, clothes are still pretty much the same.
The technology that goes into them is way more advanced though! It’s very common that your outfits be wired for sound and communications. Nano-technology has also allowed for everyday clothes that are waterproof, self-cleaning and self-repairing. Of course that means that dry-cleaners have pretty much become extinct. There are just a few left that work on vintage stuff.
Speaking of vintage, You would have hoped that first few times that the (19)70’s look had a revival would have been enough, but fashion designers all secretly (or not so secretly) hate us and have brought it back numerous more times!
Strangely, considering how technical the clothes are, the materials used to make them have gone back to the basics – the fabrics of choice are hemp, cotton, wool and silk - the words polyester and rayon will send any self-respecting person into peals of laughter (mostly that’s Anna Wintour – yes, she’s still alive, no one knows how)!
What’s really amazing these days of course is beauty – cosmetic surgery is now mostly done with lasers and everybody does it so it’s really hard to tell how old anybody is (which is why Aunt LM’s age is such a mystery). Most company benefit plans cover it since nobody wants their employees looking old – it must make it hard for retail workers to figure out who gets a Senior Citizen or Child discount as everyone, regardless of chronological age seems to want to look to be in their early 20’s.
Makeup has gotten smart – way smarter than most people. Remember that foundation that they used to have that came in 3 shades that started out white and then “magically” changed to match your skin tone – but really only worked properly if your skin was some shade of beige, not if you were really light or really dark? All foundations now self-adjust – except now there is only 1 shade available in any brand which then transforms perfectly to whatever shade you are at any given time. Not that your shade ever changes because nobody would even think of tanning anymore!
Kiera had one thing right, mascara has changed way for the better, not only does the perfect dose adhere to the brush, mascara decides for itself now if your lashes need to be thickened, lengthened or curled and just goes ahead and does it upon application, eyeliner wouldn’t dream of smearing or running and eyeshadow never moves anywhere you didn’t put it to begin with. Sadly because there is now no need for Primer Potion - Urban Decay went out of business.
The biggest change though is in lipstick – experts have been telling us for years about all the pounds of lipstick that women consume in a year so they have finally figured out a way to make it good for us. Diseases that haven’t been cured yet can be managed through your lipstick instead of having to take pills or get shots. Multi-vitamins are no longer necessary, just swipe on a coat of Vitamin Lips. Headache? Aspirin Lips! Of course the scam artists have gotten into the game too – there are lipsticks that promise to help you shed pounds, attract men and even enlarge your penis (I really hope that is being marketed to men)!
The big upside to all of this of course is that you really never can have too many lipsticks now!
Whichever historian it was that said “the future’s so bright, I gotta wear shades” wasn’t kidding, of course I don’t think he was talking about daily solar flares…
- Grace Marie -